Painful Silence

In your eyes is an ocean I wished not to swim out from,
Even though I was freezing from the cold,
But unfortunately,
The tide swept me out,
Leaving me with nothing but heartache,
As I battled within to maintain my mental sanity,
Trying so hard to kill these hallucinations which tormented me like I fed on them,
For your picture never left my head every minute of each day.

You see...All I wanted was for you to look into my eyes and see the fire that you lit up,
But this you never seemed to understand,
And to worsen it all,
The fear of being swept away by the tide again, kept me away.

Your attention I seeked, but never got, much this broke me, instilling the fear of rejection in me,
This fear which glued my lips, leaving me wordless.

Your lack of time made me unconscious,
Leaving me in a suffocating world,
Trapping me in a state of mental slavery,
And gradually,
My heart froze,
Leaving me broken in my shells,
And burying me in myself.

Now, questions unanswerable ring in my head,
Who would raise me?
Did my silence kill me, or are you my murderer?
Do I have the power to make a wish, for I need a saint?
Do I remain buried in myself, and let pain close the door of a new chance for me, or do I break free?
Can help still come, or is it late already?
Oh...who would give me the answers to these questions?


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